I realized that I now belong to a very exclusive "club," if you will. Women who have gone through breast cancer treatment are naturally bonded to each other. It's like finding a long-lost relative that you've been searching for and finally meet. I've met two such women in the last two months. The first woman actually isn't a breast cancer patient, but rather someone I met during chemo. She's a native East Coaster like myself who is now living in my area. I overheard her on the phone. Immediately, I thought "Brooklyn!" I was right! (Chemo brain conquered). We talked about where we were from, how we ended up in the middle of America and our treatment journeys. We had more in common that just New York and chemo...her son is living in Santa Barbara (my other home town) and we talked quite a bit about it. Now I realize I said "breast cancer" but Native New Yorkers in another pond can also fall into the category of finding a long lost relative. The other woman I met at a bookstore. I immediately knew that she had a mastectomy and we began talking. She just completed a her year of treatment in October; I will be done in three more weeks. We laughed and hugged and congratulated each other. We talked about the "End of Cancer Party." She had one and I am planning one as well (look out Vermillion!). It's important to mark the end of such a journey...I have three weeks to process this, then what? I must admit that I'm having some anxiety about not seeing my treatment team as often. So, after cancer support groups, here I come! Or I can head to the tiny independent bookstore and meet with my new sister.
Peace and Blessings.
Friday, January 20, 2012
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Something from David H
The Importance Of Cancer Support Groups
Many cancer patients find extreme benefit from joining cancer support groups. A network of supporters can help them manage the flood of emotions and fears they experience during cancer treatment and beyond. Studies have shown that support groups lessen anxiety, boost self-esteem, lower depression, and improve relationships. They are also excellent information and education resources.
Cancer patients, along with their family members and caregivers, often find support groups to be good therapy. But cancer support groups are not therapy groups, although psychologists and social workers may facilitate group meetings. They are more like community-based sharing groups, and each one develops a life of its own.
Whether they are cancer survivors, in remission, or going through treatment, all cancer patients have questions. And they all have numerous emotions to handle. They need a place to go for honest answers and emotional support. Cancer support groups are that place.
Support groups are empathetic communities of people who know cancer and understand the fears. Walking the cancer path is lonely, cold, and isolating. But support groups provide warm, understanding company for the journey.
Joining a cancer support group may be uncomfortable, or even scary. After all, the group members represent many different faces of cancer, and everyone must confront hard issues, including their own mortality. But support groups help validate the cancer experience and offer immeasurable support for the journey.
This validation and support is hugely important for cancer patients. It provides patients with a better grasp of their condition, and a better quality of life.
Interestingly, the survival rate may also be better for support group members than for those who undergo medical treatment alone. The American Cancer Society says many studies have been conducted to explore the effect of support groups on survivorship. While there were no hard-and-fast findings, it is evident that support groups complement medicine and help with treatment.
Some support groups are designed to help patients cope with a particular cancer. For example, Reach To Recovery supports breast cancer survivors, Man-to-Man helps men with prostate cancer, and there are even support groups out there for people diagnosed with a deadly disease like mesothelioma. Other groups, like Cancer Survivors Network, offer community and online support for people with any type of cancer.
Loved ones need support, too, and many support groups exist for family members and caregivers. These people are on the flip side of the cancer coin. They need support for their feelings of anger, guilt, frustration, and caregiver burnout.
The Internet is a helpful tool for finding cancer support groups. Patients can also locate groups through their doctor, nurses, hospital social workers, or community organizations. Some patients prefer groups that meet in person, while others are more comfortable with online support. Either way, there exists a cancer support group to meet anyone’s needs.
Cancer patients, along with their family members and caregivers, often find support groups to be good therapy. But cancer support groups are not therapy groups, although psychologists and social workers may facilitate group meetings. They are more like community-based sharing groups, and each one develops a life of its own.
Whether they are cancer survivors, in remission, or going through treatment, all cancer patients have questions. And they all have numerous emotions to handle. They need a place to go for honest answers and emotional support. Cancer support groups are that place.
Support groups are empathetic communities of people who know cancer and understand the fears. Walking the cancer path is lonely, cold, and isolating. But support groups provide warm, understanding company for the journey.
Joining a cancer support group may be uncomfortable, or even scary. After all, the group members represent many different faces of cancer, and everyone must confront hard issues, including their own mortality. But support groups help validate the cancer experience and offer immeasurable support for the journey.
This validation and support is hugely important for cancer patients. It provides patients with a better grasp of their condition, and a better quality of life.
Interestingly, the survival rate may also be better for support group members than for those who undergo medical treatment alone. The American Cancer Society says many studies have been conducted to explore the effect of support groups on survivorship. While there were no hard-and-fast findings, it is evident that support groups complement medicine and help with treatment.
Some support groups are designed to help patients cope with a particular cancer. For example, Reach To Recovery supports breast cancer survivors, Man-to-Man helps men with prostate cancer, and there are even support groups out there for people diagnosed with a deadly disease like mesothelioma. Other groups, like Cancer Survivors Network, offer community and online support for people with any type of cancer.
Loved ones need support, too, and many support groups exist for family members and caregivers. These people are on the flip side of the cancer coin. They need support for their feelings of anger, guilt, frustration, and caregiver burnout.
The Internet is a helpful tool for finding cancer support groups. Patients can also locate groups through their doctor, nurses, hospital social workers, or community organizations. Some patients prefer groups that meet in person, while others are more comfortable with online support. Either way, there exists a cancer support group to meet anyone’s needs.
Sunday, November 20, 2011
Monday, November 14, 2011
Procrastination
So I have this gene. It's a procrastination gene. It works like this: I have a thought of something that I should do, like blogging. I say to myself "I'll do that tomorrow." Tomorrow shows up, only it's six months later; I have finished the bad part of chemo and my has grown back. I have finished my first Breast Cancer Walk. And I have been fitted for prosthetic breasts. That was the tomorrow I should have been blogging about. Yesterday.
So today I have treatment. I'm there almost all day and totally exhausted after my trip from Chicago (in which I fell in love probably 40 different time a day but that's another blog...) and for a Monday, it's pretty lively. I don't usually have treatment on Mondays but as I was at a conference last week, this was my new day. And let me tell you: I think I have been missing out on a party! There were friends and family members and laughter. TONS of laughter. But there was also the usual head nods of silent empathy from other patients as they head head to the bathroom trailing their IV hangers filled with toxic bags marked with big "handle with care: chemotherapy. Dispose of properly." My doctor checks my arm for the staph infection/ cellulitis that developed last week and we celebrate my hemoglobin counts (11!). I am under warm blankets and fall asleep. The thing about sleeping during treatment is the dreams. I don't even remembered what I dreamt today. But that is really not the point. The point is that I'm doing very well. The chemo I'm doing now is herceptin. Because it's so well tolerated (no nausea, no fatigue, no vomiting!) patients are reluctant to call it chemo.But let's call a spade a spade, shall we?
Until next time...
So today I have treatment. I'm there almost all day and totally exhausted after my trip from Chicago (in which I fell in love probably 40 different time a day but that's another blog...) and for a Monday, it's pretty lively. I don't usually have treatment on Mondays but as I was at a conference last week, this was my new day. And let me tell you: I think I have been missing out on a party! There were friends and family members and laughter. TONS of laughter. But there was also the usual head nods of silent empathy from other patients as they head head to the bathroom trailing their IV hangers filled with toxic bags marked with big "handle with care: chemotherapy. Dispose of properly." My doctor checks my arm for the staph infection/ cellulitis that developed last week and we celebrate my hemoglobin counts (11!). I am under warm blankets and fall asleep. The thing about sleeping during treatment is the dreams. I don't even remembered what I dreamt today. But that is really not the point. The point is that I'm doing very well. The chemo I'm doing now is herceptin. Because it's so well tolerated (no nausea, no fatigue, no vomiting!) patients are reluctant to call it chemo.But let's call a spade a spade, shall we?
Until next time...
Saturday, June 18, 2011
L'Chaim!
So I have been terrible at blogging. This was supposed to be the one thing that kept any sanity in my life. Well, not to say that there hasn't been sanity, it's just...different. So, I had my final chemo this past Thursday! HOORAY! This has certainly been a journey, not one that I would want anyone to have to go through. In a month my hair should start growing back. I'm taking bets as to what color and texture it will be :)
I now know what it's like to have to be shut up in the house because I have no immune system. That only happened once, but it was scary nonetheless. I have never been good at accepting or asking for help from others, I am usually the caretaker. This reversal has been difficult for me and I am still learning how to deal with it. The Red Cross has set up shelters in the area due to the flooding of the Mighty Mo. It has been a helpless feeling to not be able to do what comes so naturally to me: run a shelter. But in the end, after the doctors and everyone told me NO! I have come to accept it, almost gracefully.
I always thought I would have a spiritual experience during something like this. My spirituality came not in the form of angels hovering above me but in the form of seeing the Universe all around me. Sri Krishna says to us the Bhagavad Gita "...Be humble, be harmless, have no pretension..." I think this is something that I have learned more of. I will have a Mikvah when this is all said in done, a ritual cleansing in the Jewish faith. I will say my prayers and rededicate myself to the Universe for the blessing of Life.
I am grateful for the lessons I have learned during this journey, but even more so, I am ever grateful for the strength I have found in myself, my friends and family, and most of all, in Love.
I now know what it's like to have to be shut up in the house because I have no immune system. That only happened once, but it was scary nonetheless. I have never been good at accepting or asking for help from others, I am usually the caretaker. This reversal has been difficult for me and I am still learning how to deal with it. The Red Cross has set up shelters in the area due to the flooding of the Mighty Mo. It has been a helpless feeling to not be able to do what comes so naturally to me: run a shelter. But in the end, after the doctors and everyone told me NO! I have come to accept it, almost gracefully.
I always thought I would have a spiritual experience during something like this. My spirituality came not in the form of angels hovering above me but in the form of seeing the Universe all around me. Sri Krishna says to us the Bhagavad Gita "...Be humble, be harmless, have no pretension..." I think this is something that I have learned more of. I will have a Mikvah when this is all said in done, a ritual cleansing in the Jewish faith. I will say my prayers and rededicate myself to the Universe for the blessing of Life.
I am grateful for the lessons I have learned during this journey, but even more so, I am ever grateful for the strength I have found in myself, my friends and family, and most of all, in Love.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Note to C
Dear Cancer,
You took my hair. You took my boobs. You took any sense of regularity I had, and because chemo likes to kill my blood cells, you inadvertently took those as well. But let's be clear: you will not take my love for Taco Bell Fruitistas. You will not take my desire to see good in the world, and you certainly won't take from me my outlook.
Thank you for your time.
~me
You took my hair. You took my boobs. You took any sense of regularity I had, and because chemo likes to kill my blood cells, you inadvertently took those as well. But let's be clear: you will not take my love for Taco Bell Fruitistas. You will not take my desire to see good in the world, and you certainly won't take from me my outlook.
Thank you for your time.
~me
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Babushkas
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